Who Are You?

Who Are You?

a short story

The sunlight falls on me warming my face
As the comely woman makes her way to me
She kneels down beside me with a certain grace
Asking me if I want to take my pills with some tea

For the life of me I can’t remember who she is
So I ask of her, “dear who are you?”
Her eyes shut as if she’s pondering a quiz
“Well Mrs Cole I am Nurse Bell and I’m rather new.”

What a peculiar woman, I have no need of a nurse
I try to tell her this, but she smiles and remains
Her face is kind, but her voice is rather terse
She informs me that I have to take my pills to avoid pain

I take the meds from her and her relief is clear
But as she walks away I can’t recall
And so I call out asking, “Who are you my dear?”
However she did not hear me, and I find myself feeling quite small

~~~~~~~~~~

Sitting by the fire the heat warms my soul
As two graceful women make their way beside me
“You have a visitor today Mrs Cole.”
And with that the handsome woman flees

So I look to the woman at my right
And I ask her, “could you kindly tell me who that was?”
She informs me that her name was Nurse Bell, I think she surely is a sight
The woman looks at me as if she wants to speak, but something gives her pause

Finally she speaks, “Mom I came to visit.”
I look at her closely and feel something stir
She stares at me with a cautious hope in her eyes for a minute
But like a wisp whatever it was is gone with a blur

“Why do you call me mother dear?”
I can see she’s crushed as she says “c’mon Mom think it through!”
Her face is twisted in pain as her eyes fill with tears
But all I can do is look at her and ask, “Who are you?”

Photos from my Sunrise Hikes

Given that i’m currently being buried in snow today I thought I would reminisce on when the weather wasn’t terrible. Last summer I started hiking and my friends and I were really big on getting up the mountains in time to see the sunrise, and here are the some of the photos.

This photo is my favorite hands down and it is probably the best picture that I have ever taken. Sadly its also the only photo that really displays the raw beauty of the sun as it paints itself across the landscape.

This is from a different mountain and the sun hadn’t quite come up yet.

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A Shot of PTSD

a short story

Walking into the bar I know I wont last long
There is no bar in town that will serve me more than one drink
Because if they do ill start swinging like king kong
I just cant stand drinking at home, I don’t want him to see me sink

So I take a seat and order my shot
The bartender laughs in disgust as he passes it to me
I pound it down and he sends me to rot
Now to pick up my son from my mothers and flee

On the way from the door he bumps into her car
And suddenly I’ve dropped to the ground
As her car alarm has taken me back to a land torn apart
Where death is the norm and bullets fly around

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The Heartbreak of Dementia

A touching post about how terrible dementia is and how it affects us.

Before Sundown

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by C.E.Robinson

This small woman grips the worn strap of a large black purse tucked at her side, and leans forward in the rocking chair.

Her gnarled fingers trace tiny rose petals in her skirt as if to find a path back to her life; the aging face of her daughter, her husband’s death, her 90th birthday party, her flower shop.

She sits in the same spot every day, near the entrance door, waiting for husband and daughter to take her home. The daily vigil stops when I call her name,

Ida Mae, let’s go back to your room and look at the photos of John and Olivia, and one we took last week with all the nursing staff at your ninetieth birthday party.

I visit often, hold her hand and tell her “back when I was a little girl” stories, she told me over the years. Triggering a…

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Fear and How We Handle It

“We are afraid of the enormity of the possible.” – Emile M. Cioran

Fear is an almost ever present emotion. Whether it be the fear of failure, of death or pain, of rejection, of the future, of ourselves, fear is and always will be a part of life. Fear is a problem not because it exists but because of the way we handle it. I don’t know if I know the right way to handle it because it is something I am still working on today, but what I do know is the wrong way to handle it.

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The Weight of the World

I wrote this with a friend of mine. 

This piercing rain pours down
Droplets striking the windowpane furiously
Forever torturing this lowly town
The wind caressing my skin in curiosity

As I stare out into this shattered land
My world is crumbling as I remain dormant
Holding up the remains with a broken hand
Like giant Atlas at his strongest

Now it’s broken and falls around me
Hope begins to fade whilst desolation spreads
In this vast expanse death is what I see
I take a deep breath, and carefully I tread

Enveloped in this persistent mist I move on
Desperately seeking for something to free me
But in this game I am nothing but a pawn
Hollow spirits roam in this empty sea

Dark and sinister an endless storm
The sky filled by a forsaken grey
Constant rain breaking morale is the norm
I hungrily search for the light of the new day

Though I know shadows rule this land
My determination cannot be surpassed
Sifting through these endless sands
I find that salvation is within my grasp

Broken pieces come together to mend
Fixing the puzzle that was damaged and torn,
My strength, my resolve will not bend
Through my work the world is reborn

Soundtrack to Our Lives

Without music life would be a mistake. –  Friedrich Nietzsche

That quote has recently become one of my favorites because it resonates so much with me. If you are like me, then there is rarely a time when you can be found without headphones in your ears or music being played. Music is such an incredible thing because, regardless of how you are feeling, there is a song out there for you to listen to. If you are happy, if you are sad, grieving, angry, lost, confused, tired, or any other emotion you can think of, there is music out there to accompany that feeling. And if you are like me, you seek out that music to ease your mind, drive you, calm you down, or even lull you to sleep. Music is beautiful regardless of what you listen to – music is an amazing thing. Even people who are deaf have reported being able to feel the vibrations of music, which while not the same as hearing, it still enables them to experience it, albeit in their own ways. Continue reading

Wanderer

My mind runs blank as I stare out

Into the land that  was once my home

But what I see I cannot doubt

All that’s left to me is the choice to roam

As the choice to die in what was once home

Is not the choice I will make

This world has stranded me all alone

But I will not lie down and break

I will venture out into the vast unknown

My f ears will not stop me

For the tides have changed their tones

And I will conquer these currents be it ocean or sea

Cause I cannot believe I am all that’s left

I will search everywhere that shows

Whether it be mountain tops or desert clefts

I will you before my time runs low

Least this is what I tell myself

As I prepare to begin this quest

Maybe I will make it onto the history shelves

But hopefully I’ll just be able to rest

Social Inequality

In a world overwhelmed by greed

We forget those who can’t afford to breathe

Driven by our insatiable desire to succeed

As we live our lives with relative ease

Even as decisions are made by the corrupted

In this apathetic society empathy is almost forgotten

Surrounded by comfort we don’t want to be disrupted

Our strive for equality has begun to rotten

You say that this is just the way things are

I say this is not how it was meant to be

In this course that is life equality shouldn’t settle for subpar

Some will say this is the best we can do, but I refuse to believe

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